Dad jokes: they’re cringeworthy, clever, and have a unique knack for making everyone chuckle (even if it’s under their breath). Here are 20 of the best dad jokes of all time—whether they make you laugh, sigh, or roll your eyes, they’re bound to leave an impression.
1. The Time Traveler
Dad puts the car in reverse and says, “Ahh, this takes me back.”
A joke with just the right blend of nostalgia and wordplay.
2. Shady Dealings in the Park
Kids: “Can we go play?”
Dad: “Sure, just stay away from those trees; they look a little shady to me.”
This one’s ideal for making kids sigh and shake their heads.
3. The Knock-Knock Showdown
Dad: “I know a great knock-knock joke. You start.”
Kid: “Knock knock!”
Dad: “Who’s there?” [awkward silence ensues]
Sometimes the silence is the punchline.
4. A Herd of What?
Dad: “Look at that flock of cows over there.”
Kids: “herd of cows.”
Dad: “Of course I’ve heard of cows! There’s a flock of them right over there!”
Misunderstanding never felt so intentional.
5. Fortune Cookie SOS
Dad opens a fortune cookie, gets serious, and says, “Help! I’m being held captive in a fortune cookie factory!”
Younger generations might just fall for this one the first time around.
6. To Box or Not to Box
Waitress: “Would you like a box for that?”
Dad: “No, but I’ll wrestle you for it.”
A joke with just the right amount of “dad” assertiveness.
7. Camouflage Crisis
Dad: “A man in a wheelchair stole my camouflage jacket! I shouted, ‘You can hide, but you can’t run!’”
Boldly going where only a dad joke can.
8. Furry Faller
What’s green, furry, has four legs, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree?
Answer: A pool table.
Just the right amount of absurdity.
9. Playing the Owl Card
Dad: “Someone here is an owl.”
Kid: “Who?”
Dad, narrowing his eyes: “Exactly.”
Suspenseful, mysterious, and loaded with dad-style suspense.
10. Say “Eggscuse Me”
Dad at breakfast: “I’ll have bacon and eggs, please.”
Waiter: “How do you like your eggs?”
Dad: “I don’t know; I haven’t gotten them yet!”
This one’s best with an unassuming straight face.
11. Dad’s Got Reservations
Hostess: “Do you have reservations?”
Dad: “Yes, but we’re eating here anyway.”
Why hold back when you have this kind of material?
12. A Sticky Situation
What’s brown and sticky?
Answer: A stick.
Simple but effective.
13. No Laughs from Dad
“I tell dad jokes. Sometimes he laughs.”
Self-deprecating and sweet, this one’s perfect for quiet chuckles.
14. Earn Your Right to Be Cremated
“Anyone can get buried when they die. But if you want to be cremated, you have to urn it.”
A joke with a fiery finish.
15. Surprise!
“I told my wife she drew her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.”
Straightforward with just the right touch of innocent humor.
16. Take a Bath?
Dad: “Did you take a bath?”
Kid: “No, why, is there one missing?”
A classic setup that’s still hilarious.
17. The Missing Middle Name
What does Alexander the Great have in common with Winnie the Pooh?
Answer: They have the same middle name.
It’s the kind of joke you’d expect to be shared at breakfast.
18. An Apparent Pun
How do you know when a joke is a dad joke?
Answer: When it’s apparent.
Wordplay that just doesn’t get old.
19. The Blind Man and the Well
Why did the blind man fall into the well?
Answer: Because he couldn’t see that well.
An elegantly simple punchline, this one wins with its subtlety.
20. The Pirate’s Age
“What does a pirate say when he’s 80?”
Answer: “Aye matey!”
Because no dad joke collection is complete without a good pirate pun.
There you have it—20 dad jokes that span the classics, the clever, and the delightfully cringe-worthy. Whether you chuckled or rolled your eyes, these jokes prove that dad humor is an art form all its own.
